Monday, June 30, 2003 :::
 
Right well it’s been a fantastic week. First off I want to thank everyone who sent me letter, cards, mails and presents. It was really lovely actually having stuff to open. Secondly, I would like to thank all those people who called up. Again it was lovely to hear from everyone. Very much appreciated.

Well the story starts on Monday 16th night when I left the village and headed off to Karur train station. My stomach still hadn’t cleared up by a long shot, I certainly felt better than I had done and I decided to risk it. On the way, however, a quick stop at a pharmacy (druggist’s as they call them) was in order to stock up on Flagy and other stuff to make the journey and the week a little more bearable should this bug persist.

The train, as usual, was late. I hoped on and pretty much just listened to music and went to bed.

At about 6 I got up and “freshened up.” We arrived in Chennai central station at about 6:45 and to my astonishment Poorni managed to drag herself out of bed at 5 and was there to meet me, how sweet is that, I was expecting a driver or some dude holding a large sign saying Jaime.

We headed off to their new flat which is just a few doors down from their old one. It’s really nice. Arrived just in time to see Prathiba legging it around trying to get everything together for her first day back at college (she is doing a degree in Psychology). She left at about 7:45, I went down stairs to see her off and say hey to a few friends of hers, all good.

Me and Poorni pretty much just chilled out until about. At about 1 o’clock we headed off in an auto to go and pick Prathiba up from college. She goes to the same college that Anne went to. The college was really really nice. It’s the WCC Woman’s Christian college. We arrived just as the college was breaking for the day. There were hoards of women all over campus. As we walked through to where we were meeting her I was constantly getting very odd looks for everybody. It was great. Big groups of women turning round to look at you, what man wouldn’t be happy. Poorni found all this very amusing. We hung around waiting for Prathiba and eventually she turned up with a group of friends. They all seemed really lovely.

We headed back out of the college and jumped in an auto. The auto dropped us off down the road at one of Chennai’s shopping malls where we had lunch in a McDonalds type fast food place. I had a burger, fries, coke and a plate of smilies (potato fritters in the shape of smiling faces). It was odd; I hadn’t had them since I was in London with Helene working at the Drome. Helene wouldn’t eat vegetables apart from smilies, so we pretty much lived on them. Strange how it only takes the most random, insignificant things to bring back memories. After eating Poorni headed off to do some stuff and me a Prathi went music shopping where I managed to pick up Green Day’s “greatest hits,” System of a down’s “Toxicity” and Moby’s “Play.” Poorni met up with us later and we all headed out for coffee to a place called coffee pot which is a small, nicely done up coffee house, very trendy, good music (dirty trance this time) and very good coffee. After that we went back to the flat and spent the rest of the evening chilling, watching TV, talking and listening to music.

Just before midnight Poorni disappeared claiming that one of her friends was down stairs and she wanted to go and say “hey.” At midnight Prathi gave me a massive hug and wished me happy birthday, Poorni was still no where to be seen. I went into the kitchen to get a drink when suddenly all the lights went out. This is not unusual in this country infact it’s totally normal. You tend just to forget about it after a while. When I went back into the living room I was suddenly faced by Poorni, Prathi, John (dance class dude and his brother) Yohan coming through the door with a cake (21 candles and all) and presents. I couldn’t believe it. I seriously went into a state of shock. It was the last thing I had ever expected, a midnight surprise birthday gathering with all the extras. At this point I just want to say thanks so much; you guys have absolutely no idea what it meant to me, you really don’t.

Anyway, we all sat around ate cake and chatted. John and Yohan had bought me a wicked, blue crushed cotton shirt which is really brilliant; it makes you feel like Austin Powers. The girls had bought me a fantastic GAP shirt which is really gorgeous. The cake was chocolate, good chocolate, non of that chewy Indian stuff, and it had “Happy 21st Birthday dude”, iced on top. It was fantastic. I was generally in a bit of a state; I didn’t know what to say. It took me by surprise big style.

At about 12:40 John and Yohan headed off. I stayed up with the girls for a while talking bout stuff. They couldn’t believe I hadn’t seen it coming. All Poorni’s pretend phone calls, having to go downstairs a midnight to see someone who was standing outside. Hey man, maybe I’m just stupid. We all went to bed at about 2. Poorni informed me that at 6 someone from the local shop would come with some milk, would I answer the door, Yeah sure.

At about 6:30 the door bell went. I managed to drag myself out of bed and got to the door before Amol. Milk you ask? Milk my ass. Standing there was a dude with a big basket of red and yellow/white roses. Good god, I’d fallen for it yet again. I should have seen it coming. Attached to the basket was a note. “Happy birthday; from your two favorite girls.” Can you believe these guys, I bloody can’t. Now that I was up I decided to stay up. I had to drag Prathiba out of bed at like 7 for college. Saw Prathiba off to college and then got ready to go out. Me and Poorni left at about 10. We headed off to the internet centre that is down the road the check mail, make phone calls and do stuff.
Having finished I got dropped off back at the flat. Poorni had to go and get some stuff sorted for uni in the Netherlands. I had to be by the phone having told people I would be.
Spent a few hours opening cards, watching “scream,” (a simply diabolical movie), trying to talk with Amol, who is just quite ridiculously shy and doesn’t speak English, and getting phone calls from merry olde England.

When Poorni got back we headed off to see Barnabus who was in hospital having just undergone another operation (which went fine). When we got there Tibbs and Prathiba were already there. We stayed there for an hour or so. He seemed well and in good spirits which was good. Having said goodbye we headed off to Quicky’s for coffee and ice cream. The ice-cream, (cherry garcia) tasted of bubblegum. After that we headed back to the flat stopping off to pick up some photos.
read on


::: posted by j(e t')aime at 4:29 AM

 
We were being picked up by john and Yohan (John’s brother otherwise referred to as Boopie), we would then be driven somewhere, where? They wouldn’t tell. The scene in the house just before we went out was quite ridiculous. The amount of cloths we all tried on was stupid. Even I went through several outfits.

john picked us up and we were whisked off to a restaurant called “Bella Ciao” which was a Italian pizzeria, western food, at bloody last. We were there all of 5 minutes when Iggy, Chintu, Joel and Jordan turned up. Was great to see them. They gave me a book and a card signed by all the members of MTL saying thanks for the fire performance and two pics of the performance. “Thanks guys”!! We spent the rest of the night eating pizza (and damn good pizza at that), listening to music talking and writing in Poorni’s newly acquired “random thoughts book”. The night was a great laugh. Lots of pics, wine (although I couldn’t drink because I was on antibiotics first birthday with no alcohol in a while), chit chat and general merry making. We headed off at about midnight and me and the girls were dropped back at the flat. All in all a fantastic day. Thanks to everyone who made what could have been quite a difficult day, what with being 7000 miles away from friends and family, a really memorable occasion, all good.

Thursday morning was odd. Both me and Poorni were up to see Prathi off but then went back to bed and slept, having not gotten to bed till quite late the previous night.

john came and picked us up at about 1 and we all went to Prathiba’s college to pick her up. Having done so we headed off to an American burger bar/diner called “Gallopin’ Gooseberry’s.” Me and Poorni had already eaten so we just had squishies, very good pineapple squishies. The guys ate. Having finished off here we headed off to Spencers Plaza which I a very very large mall in central Chennai, to do some shopping. We had a wonder around. Poorni looked at hands free kits for her phone, I bought U2’s latest. We met another friend of the guys called Satish who works in an office in Spencers. Seemed like a really nice dude. Slightly conservative, about 30, likes Metallica. At about 5:30 we headed back to car and then back to the flat. Dance class was that night so everyone had to get back, get changed and be ready to be picked up at 6:30. They did so. I stayed behind in the flat.

The girls got back at about 9:30 and got ready to go out. I was, unfortunately, beginning to feel decidedly dodgy, my stomach was playing up and the anti-biotics were beginning to make me feel very sick. They persuaded me to come out. We were picked up at about 10 by john and Yohan and driven to Coffee pot. We drank coffee, talked and played chess. John challenged me to a game. I played really really well (Rex you would have been proud) and had him by the balls (if you’ll pardon the expression). I was about 2 moves from winning but had, unfortunately, neglected my defense being so preoccupied in kicking his ass. He won, he shouldn’t have won. We left, I lost my hat, my favorite hat, it sucks. We got dropped back at the flat, stayed up for a bit and then went to bed.

On Friday morning me and Poorni headed into town to do yet more shopping. I needed boxers which are surprisingly hard to find seeing as most Indian men appear to wear Y fronts, nice! We picked up Prathi from college and went to buy some more music in spencers. The guys bought some headphones, a walkman and then we headed back to the flat.

In the evening we were meant to be going to see Chintu as she was on her own as Iggy was in Bangalore (I think.) Chintu called up and cancelled so we just stayed in. Me and Prathiba went out to a shop, near the flat, called nuts and spice which is amazing. It has like loads of English stuff and I aint talking about Indian copies of English stuff I am talking about proper, imported English food, sweets, drinks etc. It’s great. They have Scottish shortbread, microwavable pasta meals, pot noodles, red bull, English Cadbury’s chocolate, everything. Heaven. We bought some stuff.

When we got back the girls had this really horrible oil put in their hair by Amol. Apparently it’s really good for your hair, once you’ve washed the shit out. After much persuasion they all managed to convince me that it was god for skin as well, yeah right. I was set apon and arms, head, face and neck covered with this oil that, quite frankly, smells like shit. You have to leave it on for quite a while so I sat there unable to do anything for like an hour. It took a few attempts to get all that crap off me in the shower.

At about 10 Poorni collapsed and fell asleep. Me and Prathiba stayed up and watched MTV and other music channels and crappy American soaps until midnight. After that we just stayed up and talking like, all night. We didn’t go to bed until about 5ish.

On Saturday we all slept in really late. At about 12 we headed off to Iggy and Chintu’s to have lunch. We just chilled out, did poi (Chintu’s getting quite good as well), listened to music, looked at pics of my birthday night and of a wedding that the guys had just been to and just generally chilled. John showed up and we had lunch, meatloaf, very good. After lunch John and Iggy made music on the guitar and keyboard, I did poi and flags. Me and Poorni headed back to the flat at about 5, she dropped me and then headed off to dance class.

On Saturday night we were meant to be going to see the matrix. We had planned to go to one particular cinema for a late showing but it turned out to be sold out. We tried to get tickets to a few other places but with no luck. In the end everyone gathered round the girls flat to decide what to do. There was me and the girls, John and Yohan, Rami, Mia Ashwini, Satish and Ashwini’s brother Vikram who are all part of the same social group. It was decided in the end that we would all go out to eat and then come back to the flat. Unfortunately all the clubs and bars in Chennai had been closed by the police as someone had got shot in one particular club. The police thought it better to close down all of them until the issue had been sorted out.

We headed out at about 10 and went to Bella Ciao. We ordered lots of Pizza’s and all shared. John’s mum joined us. I had met her the night their family had taken me out to the Zachir Hussein concert in Chennai. We had a good evening; food was great, company first class. We listened and sang along to a rock duo that were knocking out hits such as “Sultans of swing” “Tequila sunrise” etc. Unfortunately they didn’t know any guns and roses but after much debate we all agreed that the best and cheesiest guns and roses song was not sweet child of mine but November rain.
read on

::: posted by j(e t')aime at 4:27 AM

 
We left at about midnight and headed off in two cars to Matchbox which is a bar in a 5 star hotel. I had been there before when I stayed in Chennai on my way back from Mumbai. Nice place. Unfortunately the bar was closed so after sitting there a few minutes listening to a singing group play “lady in red” we left and headed back to the flat. Satish, having overheard a conversation between me and Vikram about how we both liked rock and metal, put on Metalica’s first album, good god I hadn’t heard that in a while. We got back to the flat and waited for the others who turned up 15 minutes later with a bottle of whiskey, a bottle of 7-up and a bottle of Vodka. For some reason they got the tequila ritual slightly mixed up and started doing vodka with salt on the back of the hand and lime. I still couldn’t drink but that wasn’t so bad because I can’t stand either. Everyone sat around drinking. They started a game of charades. They were all very very good at it, stupidly good at it. After someone complained about the amount of noise that was coming out of the flat we all moved into the bedroom to carry on the game. I was beginning to think that there wasn’t a film that these guys couldn’t get so I came up with a few that I thought would be difficult. They managed, to my astonishment, to get “Dr Zhivago (how the hell they managed that one I have no idea) but failed to get Moulin Rouge and Pulp fiction. At about 5 o’clock everyone decided to go to bed. They were all staying over as they all had dance class the next morning. It was, again, another great night although I must confess to feeling a little uninvolved. I didn’t really know the guys apart from the girls, John and Yohan (who I don’t know all that well). I imagine, however, things will be different next time as at least I will have met them all before. Safe.

Sunday morning everyone was up bright and early. Most of the guys left before 9 and then Poorni and Satish headed off to dance class at about 10. Prathiba, who had apparently had very little sleep, refused to get up and said she, would be down at the class with me later on. I managed to drag her out of bed and we both got ready. We left at about 11.

We got to dance class which was in full swing. I sat about until the end. At 12 most people headed off but all the guys that had been there the night before hung around as it was Rami birthday and he was treating us all to lunch. I got asked to do some poi and flags. The flags got tangled up in one of the overhead fans, oops.

We headed off to Gallopin’ Gooseberry’s where we had lunch. They placed this game called 7-up which was just, quite frankly, to bizarre for words. I had a fantastic burger, fries and a pineapple squishy which was called something “blue” but was not blue at all, in England you could sue for false advertising, all good. After lunch we all headed in our separate directions. Me and the girls got dropped back at the flat. They collapsed, I watched trashy American TV, Fantastic.

In the evening we just all chilled out. At 10 ren & stimpy were on so that was worth the wait. Man that program is messed up.

Monday morning Samy and Christi showed up but I was still passed out and by the time I managed to drag myself out of bed they had already left for the meeting they had to attend. In the morning me and Poorni headed off to do yet more shopping in a few of Chennai’s department stores. Didn’t buy anything, mostly window shopping and contemplating about buying stuff. At about 12 we did lunch in an American / Italian diner called Kenzo’s. I had a burger (“mmm, this is a tasty burger” has been uttered on more than one occasion this week) and a lime cooler which was divine especially considering it was 40ºc outside.

After lunch we went to Prathi’s college to pick her up. I had stupidly agreed not to wear either sunglasses or my hat as several people had commented that you could never see my eyes. As I walked through the campus I felt naked, it’s really stupid I know and I don’t know why I always seem to make a point of covering my eyes. Since I got here there have been very few times when I haven’t had either on. I pretty much do it in the UK as well. Maybe it’s an insecurity thing. Anyway, we picked up Prathiba and took a photo of the two of us standing outside Anne’s old department in the college. Then we headed off to spencers plaza. I bought Cypress Hill’s “Temple of doom” and bought the girls Jakarta’s “visions” (a simply fantastic album). Prathi bought some pillow’s (I have no idea why) and Poorni bought a hands free kit for her phone (I think). We had a wonder round and then headed off to Coffee pot for coffee and ice-cream. Chilled out in coffee pot for a while and then headed off back to the flat.

Back at the flat I packed in record time (as a lot of you know when leaving for somewhere I always leave it to the very last minute). They had ordered me a cab at 6:15 because they had a family gathering to get to. After goodbyes I jumped into the cab and headed off to the train station.

The journey took about half an hour. I arrived, signed a few bits of paper which billed AREDS for the cab fair and legged it into the station. First time on my own in Chennai station, no problems. Platform number, double check train number, 15 minute walk up the platform (one hell of a long train) check your name on the piece of paper stuck to the outside of the AC carriage, get on.

The train started off ok. Music, idle chit chat with person sitting next to me about Harry Potter, English music, London and Karur, ate Poorni’s egg Masala and chapatti (which were fantastic), more music, some contact juggling, the usual stares, made bed (bottom bunk with no one above he, fantastic), sleep. At about midnight it started to get really really cold. The concept of cockroaches running around the train and around my bunk has ceased to bother me as I have done the journey quite a few times, but it was bloody freezing. I didn’t really sleep all that much at all. Ended up listening to music for half of the journey and trying to sleep the rest.

Up at six, freshen up & spent the next 45 minutes leaning out of an open door watching the scenery wiz past. Was met in Karur by Raj and headed back to the village. Got back, quick cup of coffee, opened mail (thanks dad, granny, Grandad and mum), collapsed on my bed and fell asleep.
read on

::: posted by j(e t')aime at 4:22 AM

 
Woke up late and didn’t really do anything all day. Samy arrived back at about 8am from Chennai. I wrote letters, wrote blog, read, listened to music, that’s about it.

Wednesday saw Christi return. I got up to go to work in the morning and then realised that unfortunately I couldn’t go to work because I had left my sandals in Chennai. The only other alternative would be to go to work in my swears, yeah right, cause I can see that happening. I needed a pair of sandals. I called up the girls and asked if they could post them down along with all the other stuff I had forgotten. Poorni was leaving to Bombay the next day and said that she would get Prathiba to post them, I really couldn’t that happening (sorry Prathi) so I headed into Karur to buy some more, get some photo’s developed and do some other stuff that I can’t remember off hand.

Thursday was a bit of an odd day to. I had sandals so I could go to work and g up with the intention of going in. I was about to leave when I was informed that I had been summoned to the police station as they were not satisfied with where I had been since I got to the country. They were also confused as to why I had put down that I had entered India on Jan 20th 2003 and yet how my visa said that I had entered in May 2003. We suddenly remembered that we hadn’t given them a copy of my original visa cause they didn’t ask for it. They wanted to know exactly where I had been since January, they wanted phone numbers, addresses, the works. Anund took me in. We gave them my passport and after much conversing I was informed that they wanted 7 letters saying where I had been, since January and 7 copies of my original visa. Good lord, where do these guys get off? I have a valid Indian visa (issued by the Indian government), a valid passport, what’s their bloody problem.

After the police we went into Karur to pick up some tuff. I managed to get an Indian sim card for my phone which now means I have an Indian mobile number. I get unlimited free texts, calls are just R.s. 3 per minute and it works in the whole country, not just Tamil Nadu. I also managed to pick up a new face for my Nokia and a brand new Lithium ion battery all for about 8 squid, not bad eh. My new mobile number is (dialed in full from UK (you can also send texts) 0091919842375104.

We headed back to the village. I had lunch. Dr Hema turned up (as she usually does on a Thursday). I explained to her that my stomach was still not recovered from the bug. She said that I probably didn’t just have amoebic dysentery and that it was probably a mix of amoebic and giardiasis which is another parasite. She also said that the dosage of metronidazole that I had been on was not strong enough by a long shot and that I should have been on about 1000mg a day not 600 a day. She also prescribed me some more drugs to take, yippee.

Earthworm Jim
Hands up who remembers earth worm Jim? Well I have had a run in with one of this dudes cousins. Having said that I had seen a lot of wildlife in this country I was yet to experience the most important kind, i.e. the kind that you become more attached to.
Yes, I am indeed talking about the kind of wildlife that lives inside you. Worms are apparently very very common out here. Young people de-worm themselves every few months especially when they live in rural areas like I am. Apparently this is all totally normal. This may be all totally normal to these people but to me (and I imagine most other western people) it aint. The thought of something living in you is just a bit gross. Anyway, Doctor Hema decided that it was probably a good idea to give me something just in case there was something lurking inside me. I felt like I should be in “aliens.” I can’t remember having any run ins with face huggers.

So what do I know about these things. Well, they are about a meter or so long, they look like string (apparently), they are white and the tablets you take top get rid of them taste like oranges. You get them by ingesting eggs that are found in food. They aint harmful at all and the tablets have no side effects. Well I can tell you that that last piece of info is a load of crap. They make you feel very sick. I thought the tablets were like some suicidally strong laxative that made your inside wretch so much that these bastards aint got anything to hang on to, but no, thankfully, it just kills the buggers. Well that’s about it, take this tablet once every 2 months and your fine, no worms at the bottom of my garden.

In the evening I watched Bowling for Columbine which I had bought for Samy’s birthday. OH MY GOD that film is amazing.

On Friday myself and Anund headed into Karur to visit our dear friend the chief inspector of police. We gave him the pile of paperwork saying that I had been in Chennai and Bombay from Jan 20th till May 13th, and this, apparently, settled the matter, only time will tell if that’s true, well at least he didn’t ask for anymore money.

We then headed into town because I needed to purchase a new LCD screen for my phone. The old one was beginning to fade etc. I had phoned up Nokia in Chennai and they had said it would cost R.s. 1435 plus installation plus it would take a few days. The first shop we visited said it would cost R.s. 1700 and would take 4 days to do. I didn’t want to wait that long or pay that much. We went to the next place who said it would cost R.s. 400, I asked what day we could pick it up, Monday, Tuesday. The reply, come back in half an hour. We went across the road, had a mango squishy and were back in ten minutes. It was already done. It just shows you that if you shop around you can get a much better deal. I was amazed. So was Anund.

Saturday morning I went to work. The roof has been finished on both buildings and has been started on the theatre. The water pipes have all been laid and pumps and stoppers fitted. The tiles are coming next week. Spent the morning filling the gap between the pool wall and the outer wall, (about a meter apart) with sand and concrete.
read on

::: posted by j(e t')aime at 4:16 AM

Sunday, June 29, 2003 :::
 
Got back and had lunch. Didn’t do much in the afternoon. Samy had left for Chennai in the morning as he is off to Beirut for a three day meeting. He will be back on the 4th. Christi left at 8 for Chennai to help out Poorni who has been running all over the country trying to sort out her visa etc. She left for Bombay on Monday, was told she should be in Chennai, cam back to Chennai and has been standing in massive ques all week just so she can get someone to say that her birth certificate is accurate. She has to provide a mass of info none of which is actually relevant. It’s ridiculous. Hang in there babe.

In the evening, seeing as there was no one around I sat down with my birthday beer (I had saved because I couldn’t drink on my birthday) and watched bowling for Columbine, again. Ok, I know what your saying but believe me its better to watch that then the movies I have seen a million times.

Not much going on otherwise. Am back to work, not to sure how long we are going to be at it but everything is moving all be it slowly. Will probably be going up to Chennai for the 18th July as Poorni is having a farewell party in a beach house. Will probably do some fire if it’s on the beach. Was planning on pending some time in Chennai at some point but not to sure when. Was also thinking about paying someone for Tamil lessons. Seems like a good thing to do because it will make things easier plus it will occupy me whether I am in Chennai or Karur. It would also be good to come out of this with something as cool as another language. The person I was meant to be traveling with can’t come and I have heard that the Nepal visa office is notoriously difficult so I may have to consider going somewhere else to get another visa in November. A lot of people are asking me when I am coming back. Well at the earliest I will be back in January but to be honest if I can find something top occupy me, something to do then I am not ruling out the possibility of extending my stay. I don’t see that there is any reason to hurry back if I am doing stuff out here.

Anyway, hope everyone is well. Thanks again for all the birthday stuff and I shall speak to or hear from you all soon.

Safe

jaime
the end

::: posted by j(e t')aime at 8:59 AM

Saturday, June 14, 2003 :::
 

Greetings,

Well, first off I apologise for it being such a long time since I mailed or blogged. The Internet has been terribly unreliable, I've been away a lot and as this thing has been getting bigger editing it and stuff like that has become more and more difficult which is why there may be a few cock-ups in it. I can't be bothered to read through it all again so here goes nothing. Thank you very much to Poorni for sitting there with one hell of a massive print out and editing the whole bloody thing. Without her it would have even more mistakes in it.
Up to date news:

· My whole blog is being printed off and sent to someone at UEA who is interested in having it published on my return, whenever that may be? Quite exciting, not bad at all.
· It being my birthday on June 18th I may be going up to Chennai to spend some time there. Thought that it would probably make a better location for one celebrating the ripe old age of 21. There's more to do, more shopping can be done and there are bars and nightclubs for entertainment and nights out. Still not too sure if it's going to happen. Depends on several things (to name a few) such as the weather (was 45°c the other day, apparently the hottest its been for 90 years or something stupid like that). Not to sure if I will be able to handle the heat, may get ill again and don't want that. Samy's birthday is on the 15th so want to be here for that and it depends if the girls feel like putting up with me, again. Few other things won't go into them now.

Right, back to the last few weeks. Have been running around like a headless chicken. First off was Bombay (Mumbai), then to Chennai, then to Karur, then to Sri Lanka (cut short) then to Chennai and then back to Karur. A whole bunch of stuff has happened since then. So here goes. Word of advice, copy all this into "Word," "Works" or whatever word processor you use. Read it in that or print it, it will work out cheaper as there are about 20,000 words (31 pages of it). Hope you enjoy it.

Bombay/Mumbai

The story begins on the morning of Friday 25th April when myself, Samy and Christi boarded a train to Mumbai (Mumbai). Along with all our luggage we had 2 boxes containing over 100 bananas, a box of papaya, a few boxes of mangoes and a massive roll of banana leaves for eating on. I wondered why we didn't just uproot a few bloody banana trees. These were all for the first communion of two family members. The train left at 2ish and would arrive in Mumbai at about 9 the next evening making it a whopping 31-hour journey. The train journey itself wasn't too bad but boredom kicked in after a while. The journey revolved mostly around playing cards, reading and discussing the finer things in life with Christi and Samy. Since the train is a long distance train there were dudes constantly walking up and down the walkway selling coffee, tea, samosa's, cooked food, magazines, books and lots of other stuff. Whenever we stopped at a station the train was boarded by yet more dudes trying to sell everything from food to toys. We had lunch ordered from the train canteen and generally chilled out. We went to bed at about 10ish.

The next day was rather like the first. After a wash and walk we settled down to more food, cards, discussion and reading. Toward the end of the journey, as I was beginning to loose every single card game we played, I was befriended by a coca cola yuppie salesperson called J.P. He lived in Bombay but spent a lot of time in Goa, really wicked dude. He took over my game and won most of them. He gave me his number in Mumbai and said to give him a shout at some point if we wanted to go out clubbing. He also said to give him a call if I was ever in Goa if I wanted to hook up and get expert tuition on the local area & nightlife.

We arrived in Mumbai at about 9ish and were met by Viji and Suresh who took us back to the house of Suresh and Gerry, where we were staying. When we arrived we found a whole load of people including Iggy, Chintu, Jordan and Joel and Poorni and Prathi. We had dinner and then went to bed. Because there were so many of us we all slept on the floor in the living room, which was kinda cool.

The next day, having got up early, we had breakfast and then headed off to church where Rohit (Gerry and Suresh's son) and another were about to take their first communion which is seen as a really really big deal over here (not too sure how its seen in the UK.) We got a lift down to the church. The first thing that hit me was how everyone who was going to be getting their first communion (there were about 20 of then) looked like they were getting married. The girls were all wearing white looking wedding dresses with veils and the boys were all dressed up in suites or similar attire. It looked really odd all these kids (between the age of 6 and 11ish) dressed up like they were about to tie the bloody knot. The service was really nice. The kids and their parents were paraded up the aisle, there were hymns, all the kids did a reading and some of the parents did one as well. I was sandwiched between Samy and Christi with Chintu, Iggy and the boys on the other side. They all took their communion and then so did everyone else (apart from little old me.) When the service ended the parents and kids headed off to some church celebration and myself and Samy walked back to he house whilst everyone else got a lift. The house is in a really lovely part of Mumbai. The streets are very wide and lined with very tall Georgian looking houses. The whole place is very green and unlike anything I had previously seen in an Indian city, it looked very British. The house was equally impressive and was designed by one of the uncles. It is all on one floor (the third or forth of the building) and is reached by a private lift (which was very cool.) It was pretty dam big.

When we got back to the house everyone kinda chilled out for a bit. There was present given to Rohit and lots and lots of photo's taken with the different groups of people who had come to this very special occasion. I was included in the Karur family. There were lots and lots of people staying in the house during this time (maybe 15-20) so there were lots of people just hanging around. In the evening there was going to be a big party and so people like caterers were setting up on the very large open balcony that they have. This was decorated with fairy lights and other decorations. There were very large metal containers being filled with food and tables and chairs were set up.

In the evening, once everyone had got ready, more and more people started showing up until the house was pretty full (by say 9ish). There was lots of eating going on; there was a bar (although I was not, for several reasons, drinking). There were waiters walking around with trays of appetizers and drinks and there was a seemingly endless supply of both. Once everyone had eaten (appetizers) there was the cake cutting ceremony, the cake was a large double tiered one and everyone gathered round to see Rohit and Rachael cut it and make their speeches in which they thanked everyone for coming and explained how this had been a very special day due to the fact that they had been accepted into the church and had received Jesus properly for the very first time. After this there was a prayer and after this the main bulk of the food was served in from the big metal thingy's. Whilst everyone was eating I had been asked to do some poi to entertain. This I did. It was good but it was a little hot and I had to be very careful not to get tangled up in the ceiling fan. From what I gathered, from what people said after I was finished, everyone seemed to have enjoyed it. Felt good that I had in some way contributed to the occasion. Was feeling a little iffy so I didn't eat much. This, as usual, came as a big surprise to everyone and a lot of people automatically assumed (as most people over here do) that it was cause I didn't like the food. It took a lot of explaining. Apparently some people, namely Christi, were worried about my general intake of food. I have tried to explain that it is just me and that I generally don't eat a huge amount even whilst at home. This is generally a reoccurring theme that I have to deal with as and when it is brought up. The whole evening was thoroughly enjoyable, really good. I really enjoyed myself. Everyone began to leave at about 1ish and then the rest of us just chilled out, played card (a past time that was going to take up a lot of our evenings and late nights from now until I left).

I was meant to be returning to Karur on the 28th or 29th. Having had such a good time over the first few days I really wanted to stay up in Mumbai. Samy and Christi had delayed their flight back home until the 28th and when the day came for me to leave we phoned up the train station to check whether or not my ticket had been confirmed i.e. whether I had a place on the train. The answer, no. I was wait listed which meant I could travel but in the unreserved compartment. This has no beds just chairs and is generally filled up with a lot of people most of whom, so I was told, were people that I didn't really want to spend a 32 hour train journey with. This was on the Tuesday or the Wednesday morning. Immediately myself, Suresh and Poorni legged it down to the train station to cancel my ticket and get a refund, which we managed to do and only incur a R.s. 100 charge, which was fantastic. The girls were planning on going back to Chennai on the 1st so that gave me a few more days with them and the rest of the people in Mumbai which was fantastic. The only problem was, how was I going to get all the way from Mumbai to Karur? A few days later Rex (Christi's brother) came to my rescue and said that if I wanted to I could travel with him and his daughter Divya back down to Chennai with them, in the car. They planned to leave around the 1st and be back in Chennai around the 3rd. This was fantastic. Due to the fact that I was meant to be flying out to Sri Lanka on the 12th I decided to spend the time in between in Chennai with Poorni and Prathi.

The plan was set. Then came the first of many many changes. The girls had decided that they didn't want to do the massive train journey back to Chennai and that they were going to fly back. After much changing of the date and several very complicated decisions they managed to get themselves booked on a flight leaving on Monday 5th, getting into chennai on Tuesday 6th. Rex also had other plans and after a million and one changes decided to head back on Monday 5th to be in Chennai on Wednesday 7th. I did contemplate flying back with the girls but came to the conclusion that I couldn't really afford it, hey, I like long car journeys, good chance to see some of India. The plan was to drive to Belgaum, stay there Monday night then drive to Bangalore, stay there Tuesday night and then to drive to Chennai in time for Wednesday lunch.

Right, leaving arrangements covered, what was I doing in Mumbai?

Well, seeing as it was quite a while back, I didn't take any notes and my memory is like a bloody sieve, recalling what happened on what day is, unfortunately, going to be impossible. So, with lots of jumbling around of dates, here are some of the things we did.

Life "in the big brother house."

As I have already mentioned there were a lot of people staying in the house. The house belonged to Suresh and Gerry whose son is Rohit; Suresh's brother Viji who also lives there along with their uncle thingy. People staying included Samy and Christi, Rex (Christi's brother) and his daughter Divya, Poornima & Prathiba, me, Iggy, Chintu with Joel and Jordan, Marian (another one of Christi's brother's,) Anita (Suresh's sister) and her daughter Nikita, Bibiana (one of Christi's sisters) and her husband Francies Xavier.

People generally got up anywhere between 7 and 9. There were two showers so there was always a rush for them although, and most of you guys should agree with me on this one, sharing them with so many women aint easy. Breakfast was taken once one got up and was always very very good. Then we got along with what we were doing. If we didn't go out then we just sat around and talked and stuff. Being around so many people, as most of you know, is what I do and when I get along best and the fact that there were always so many people around meant that there was pretty much always something to do. We did one of several things:

Cards: - Cards were a very big part of Mumbai. We would play (usually myself, Rex, Prathiba, Gerry, Chintu, Marian and Bibiana (Christi's brother and sister) late into the night sometimes not going to bed till like, 2 or 3. They taught me several new games. We were playing with My Jack Daniels cards and Singapore airlines cards, which got nicknamed "the SARS cards." We played a lot and I mean a lot of Rummy and some other games, which I can't remember, but one that I never got the rules of.

Music: - There was a music player which was one of those old things that makes a far superior sound to any of the new things you can get. I found myself saying, several time. "Aahh, they don't make them like they used to." God, how old am I? There was a lot of Rock 'n' Roll, Elvis, some classical, Bob Marley and various other things. There was also a piano upon which many jamming session took place sometimes with four people on the piano at once. My limited playing got put to use and myself and Poorni came up with a few nice tunes. Rex is also a good piano player and so is thingy so it made for some interesting jamming sessions.

Also, I am sure I have mentioned the dance class that the girls go to, well, Prathi kinda teaches there and is a fantastic dancer, does it like semi pro. There was lots of dancing at the parties and in the evenings, when there was nothing else to do, always started by the 2 of them. Swinging tennis balls around on string seems stupid in comparison when compared to dancers, especially of that level.

Chess: - Having never played chess seriously but having played a bit Rex was keen to give me a game or 2, or 3. He annihilated me every time. In actual fact he annihilated everyone until, that is, one night, Marian accepted the challenge. You could cut the tension with a knife. Have a good picture of the 2 of them concentrating like mad. Very tense games. Marian came out on top, twice.

Talking: - Lots and lots of talking. I spoke to the uncle about architecture and stuff, to everyone about poi, juggling, religion, the war on Iraq, and everything under the sun. Me and Prathiba didn't seem to stop talking.

We talked with the kids. All the kids thought I was American and weren't bothered about sharing this fact over and over and over again. They thought cause I was white and spoke English that I had to be American. This came up in conversation a lot as it just shows how Americanized youth culture over here is. Most people weren't convinced at this, and it took a lot of examples and explaining. The bit that finalised all thought on the matter and banished any doubt on the subject was when I asked them what nationality Harry Potter was, three guesses on what the answer was, yep, American.

Sleeping: - Everyone seemed to sleep in the afternoon. This is still a practice which messes me up a bit especially if I aint been doing much before hand. I did sometimes but a lot of the time I just read. Most of us just slept on mats on the floor in the living room. Much more interesting than sleeping alone, in a room, in a bed. One had to be careful about sleeping in especially seeing as one morning, Iggy came in and filmed me, Poorni and Prathi asleep. We saw the tape, how cruel is that? I will have my revenge. Iggy my friend, watch out!

Shopping: - One day myself, accompanied by Anita, Poorni, Prathi, Divya and Gerry, headed into town by train. I say train; it looked more like a box on wheels that cattle get transported around in. It was big openings in the walls to act as doors, had metal railing attached to the roof from which metal loops were attached to act as holding on handles and it smelt like a London public toilet. It had a separate carriage for women to avoid the terrible problem of what is known as "eve teasing" and is basically when men group, tease and say nasty and disgusting things to women.

Having reached inner Mumbai we headed off to an old very tall building that looked more English than the Union Jack. It was a shop called "Planet M" and was basically an Indian version of "Virgin" or "HMV." It was very nice and had a wide selection although I couldn't fine any "ren & stimpy" VCD's. You have to leave your bag in a cloakroom upon entry, which is typical of many big Indian stores. We had a look round that and then headed off to Fashion Street.
The shopping in Mumbai is very very good and, being stuck with a massive group of women (Poorni, Prathiba, Chintu, Gerry, Divya, Anita), you can probably guess where I was dragged three days running. One of the first places we visited was a place ironically named "Fashion Street." Basically it was a cross between Oxford Street and Norwich market (St. Nicks if you're in Bristol.) It was a very very long street with a few million stalls running along the right hand side selling cloths, lots of cloths. Everything from designer fakes to Skateboard makes like "Blind," underwear to nightwear and lots of accessories. The deal with shopping with Indian women is pretty much the same deal as shopping with English women. They enter a stall and emerge hours later having not bought a thing. Constant questioning of everyone, "does my bum look big in this" type stuff. It took us a whole afternoon to do fashion street and we didn't even get to the end. I just followed behind constantly fending off attacks left, right and bloody center from stall holders yelling things like "you're my best friend," "hello boss" "I think I have this in your size." I just trundled along doing contact juggling, surprising enough I did quite enjoy myself although when I stopped at one point to look at a shirt I was told "polama" or "shall we go." I was compensated for such abruptness as Poorni and Prathi bought me two necklaces one of which resembled my contact-juggling ball.

On one occasion, in the evening, we headed out to yet another of Mumbai's many shopping street and, if I might add, every man's worst nightmare. A whole street that sold nothing, and I do mean nothing, but shoes. The street wasn't as long as Fashion Street and took a lot less time, but still, shoes, I mean come on guys, like you people don't have enough shoes as it is. After braving the torture that was Shoe Street we headed up the road in an auto to a department store called Shoppers stop where I was finally allowed, no, permitted to make some purchases. I got two sleeveless tops.

After doing Shoe Street (or "Elm Street") and Shoppers Stop we headed off in three wheelers to a restaurant that was owned by a friend of Gerry and Suresh's, which is apparently branching out to the UK. The food was all based on Chapatti like pancakes and was very good. As usual I received the normal amount of interrogation about not eating enough. Poorni and myself had a bit of a fight/falling out over an incident that happened, like, a week into my trip to India and didn't speak the rest of the night. Don't worry; we made up the next morning.

On another shopping trip we headed of to a very nice shop, as Poorni needed a black dress for special occasions. Having, as usual, tried on a few she finally made a decision and bought a very flattering black number which she, quite frankly, looked stunning in. We also bought Nikita (Anita's daughter) a birthday dress (as it was her birthday ironically).

On one occasion everyone (Poorni, Prathi, Rex, Divya, Gerry, Suresh, Viji, me, Iggy, Chintu, Joel, Jordan, Anita) headed into Mumbai to a shopping mall. In it I was very very surprised to find a "Marks & Spencers" and, much to my utter delight, a McDonalds. Now I rarely eat McDonalds in the UK (unless I'm with Hadley) but having mentioned my missing English junk food to someone in the past they had decided to take me there, which was utterly FANTASTIC. One McChicken sandwich, large portion of fries and a massive Sprite later and I was full but very satisfied. Throughout the whole meal (if I dare call it that) everyone was constantly commenting that I looked like I was in heaven. I have never, ever enjoyed a McDonalds so much. The odd thing was that it was a McDonalds, I thought it was going to taste different, be different, like, more Indian, but it was just a plain old greasy, reconstituted rubbish McDonalds.

After this we all kinda split up and had a wander round the 5-story shopping mall. Prathiba and myself bought ourselves a hat each from a shop called "weekender" (I look like a Muslim in hers.) I also managed to pick up Massive attack's "blue lines" Red-hot Chili's "Blood, Sugar, Sex, Magic" and Incubus' new album, whose title escapes me at the moment, for about a fiver. We had a look in a lot of shops, I saw a wicked pair of Oakley's with metal straps that go over your head and the biggest flat screen TV I have ever seen. We headed down stairs to regroup and found everyone playing on one of those games of strength where you have to hit that pad with a hammer and see how far the light goes up. We watched for a bit and then, realizing that there was way too much testosterone hanging around, wandered back off to have a look at some more stuff.

After that we headed off to this church on top of this hill, which was right on the coast. It was really beautiful and the view was pretty damn good to. We took a walk up to a shrine right on the coast that also overlooked the church. It was a warm, sunny afternoon, gorgeous. After this we headed down onto the sea front where we had coffee in one of the many coffee houses dotted along the coastline. The sea view infront, the Mumbai skyline to the right, good coffee, good views (not just good company. All good.

On the way back to the house we stopped off at the dress shop to pick up Poorni's dress and I legged it into a shop called something like "Rock stop" and purchased a very nice short sleeved black shirt. I resisted the temptation to buy yet another hat.

Another day, having left the women in the car for which they complained greatly when we returned, myself, Iggy, Rex and Viji headed off to buy some software for Iggy. After much bargaining we managed to get a lot of new software for absolutely nothing.

Other forms of entertainment that required going out.

Right, well apart from going out shopping we also went out and did a lot of other stuff. The first major thing we did was going to the IMAC cinema, which was part of a massive cinema-plex. We went to see "EVEREST" which was very very good. It was pretty breathtaking actually, having images all round you with a very steep drop infront of you. It lasted about an hour and told the story of an expedition to Everest of a dude, whose father was the first to climb it, and his team. It was brilliant but apparently, visually; it wasn't as good as one that they had previously seen about the Australian coral reef.

On another occasion we went to the late showing of "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets" (9:30) which aint been out long here just like "Lord of the Rings Two Towers" which has just been released). Really enjoyed that as well although I had already seen it. There was an interval, which was odd, and when I returned back to my seat I ended sitting down, missing the top of the seat (in the upright position which I was aiming for) and ended up hitting the floor hard. Everyone thought this was most amusing, hey man, glad I was able to make everyone laugh, even at the expense of my but'. Poorni and Prathi were in fits and are still reminding me of the incident. The movie finished at like 12:30.

The "Gateway to India" and the "Queens necklace."

The Gateway of India is situated in and faces out to Mumbai's harbour. It's basically a really big arch that looks a lot like the arch de triumph. It s a really popular hang out for the locals especially in the evening. The Queens Necklace thingy is basically all the lights that go round the harbour. When flying out of Mumbai it looks like a necklace, apparently. We parked down on, and then walked along the waterfront down to the "gateway" which, incidentally is opposite the Taj Mahal hotel. It was dark, there were lots of people around and the arch was lit up and looked magnificent. There were boats and piers leading out into the water, they were decorated with lots of lights and the effect of them reflecting and shimmering off the water was quite stunning. There, as is usual with all popular places in this country, were loads of people trying to sell stuff. We had a walk round the arch and then headed back to the car. On the way back we saw a red carpet coming up the steps from the water, it then crossed the road and entered the Taj. There were lots of people gathering and looking over the side down into a boat that had just arrived and moored next to the steps. After a while we gathered that it was the dude who own's a big chain of men's wear shops in India called "Raymond." He is, apparently, a really famous person which was made obvious by the reception he got from people as he ascended the stairs from the boat with his wife who is also famous for something, I think, although I can't remember what. We headed back to the car having seen the dude.

Having all pilled back into the Sumo we headed back to the house taking the route along the waterfront. It was really busy. This was obviously a big local "hangout" especially for Mumbai's cool, hip, trendy yuppies. There was a laser and water display situated on the water's edge. Was very impressive. We drove back through Mumbai. Mumbai is an odd city. It has a skyline that looks like it should belong in a large American city. The majority of the city looks European; one could be forgiven for thinking that you were in Europe. It is very difficult to believe, half the time, that you are actually in India. A lot of the buildings are very colonial.

One night we all headed out and went for ice cream. Was Fantastic. On the Sunday (being the 4th) everyone headed off to mass at 8. That was too early for me and the girls and apparently too early for Rex as well. We went at about 11. Was nice, was still able to recite a lot of the ceremony harking back to the days when I would go to church every Sunday as a kid.

Attack of the Praying Mantis.

One night someone came running out onto the balcony to inform me that there was a praying mantis in the house, it had just come in through the window. I really wanted to get a picture of it but seeing as my camera aint got zoom it meant getting very close to the thing. Prathi managed to pick the thing up (it was about the length as a playing card, maybe a bit longer.) It was really really beautiful. I bent down with my camera to get a picture and got as close to her hands as I could, very slowly. The thing obviously saw the reflection of itself in my head, thought it was another mantis (possibly a female) and made a jump for my head. I don't like bugs, they are fine when they are on someone else's hands but when one makes a jump for you its kinda a different story. Anyway, that's what it did. It jumped/flew at me and landed on my head. Like with the bat that landed on my head I didn't really realize and then when I did I jumped back, understandably, and brushed the thing off onto the floor. It nearly gave me a bloody heart attack. The thing was like crawling on the floor, had it been another type of bug I would have just stepped on it but these things are really gorgeous, even if they have just scared the living daylights out of you. Having calmed down a bit it was transported, by way of a newspaper, outside onto the balcony. There Rex, with his massive zoom camera, took a picture of it before it decided to either commit suicide or escape. Either way it just crawled to the edge and dropped off.

Nikita's birthday.

On 30th it was Nikita's (Anita's daughter's) birthday and she had reached the ripe old age of 4. We had a party at the house. First off was the very important ceremony of present opening. These included cuddly toys, a doll, and about a million and one dresses one of which was from Poorni, Prathi and myself, having been purchased a few days earlier. It was a nice two-piece little number with red and blue overlapping frills for the dress and a blue top, she looked adorable, like something out of Moulin Rouge. From what I remember our dress did feature in the next few days wardrobe so that's good. Nice she liked it. After this came cake, candles and "happy birthday" which, as usual, had several verses of "and god bless you to" and "and long life to you" and some other variations. The cake was pretty damn good, chocolate, but proper chocolate, not the funny, brittle Indian chocolate. All good.

All said and done had a really, totally, wonderful time in Mumbai. Am so glad that my train was wait listed. Met loads of new people. Saw a city that I really liked a lot. Saw some fantastic stuff, did some fantastic stuff. Was fantastic to see Poorni after such a long while and me and Prathiba have become very close in a very short period of time which is very odd seeing as we hadn't spoken at all until we met in Mumbai. It was amazing. "Happy times" as they say. Safe.

Homeward bound.

On the morning of Monday May 5th, at about 8, myself, Rex and Divya set out on the monstrous journey to Chennai, a journey that would cover 1400km, would take 48 hours of driving and would span 3 days. Our aim was to reach Chennai on the morning of the 7th with two stops, one in Belgaum and another in Bangalore. The first day of the journey was visually stunning. We headed up into the hills that surround Mumbai; we drove through tunnels carved into the hills and gradually wound our way up to the hill stations where the weather was cooler and the scenery dramatic. We made several coffee stops and then stopped for lunch in an out of the way restaurant. Chinese food, always good and certainly not as greasy as it is in the UK. We made good timing and arrived in Belgaum at about 7ish where we checked into a really lovely hotel. We chilled out in the room for a while, watched a movie, drank loads of coffee and then headed down to the restaurant to eat. After this we turned in for the night, knackered is not the word. We had been driving for over 11 hours and my ass was numb

In the morning we headed off at about 7. In the evening we had discussed the possibility that if we reached Bangalore in good time we would drive through the rest of the 300km to Chennai, a prospect that was met with enthusiasm. We made good time in the morning and refrained from stopping often so that we could make Bangalore before 4 o'clock, which we did. We reached the outskirts of Bangalore at about 3:30 and stopped off in a roof top restaurant to eat lunch, slightly late and most welcome. We had chicken biryani, spiced rice with massive lumps of chicken in it, and lots of it. Then on the advise of Rex's brother in law (who we were meant to be staying with but who turned out to be in Chennai) decided to call it a day and head off to a hotel. The first attempt failed and we checked into an expensive 3 star right in the middle of Bangalore city center.

After freshening up we headed out in an auto to see some of Bangalore, do a bit of shopping and take in one of the many trendy new bars that were in the city. We had a wander round a government craft type shop, a few cloths shops and then headed off on the advise of the hotel to a bar called STYX. This is when things started to get weird. The bar, which was approached by a long flight of stairs, was a rock / metal bar. The walls were plastered with heavy metal posters of bands, many of which I had seen, and listened to in my youth. The place was nicely done with glittering star lit type ceiling and very good beer. Now, usually such places in the UK are dumps on account of the people the music pulls in but this place was very civilized with fish tanks, nice tables and chairs and it even had waiters who took your drinks orders, no staggering up to the bar for these guys. On one of the walls was a large video projector playing music videos whilst a DJ played everything from mellow rock like Dire Straits to gut wrenching metal from bands like System of a Down, Pantera and many others. It was really really odd, I felt very much at home with my beer, the music (most of which, to the surprise of most people in the bar, I knew and mouthed all the lyrics to). Unfortunately and totally understandably Divya did not. We finished our drinks and headed back to the hotel to have dinner.

Dinner was a buffet and a very good one at that. After another beer and some chit chat about the war on Iraq, cloning and rock music we turned in for the night. Another long day, my ass was still numb.

We left the hotel at about 8 the next morning with the view for driving straight through with no stops and reaching Chennai around lunchtime. We had traveled over 1100km and spent the last two days in the car, the morning drive was going to seem like a stroll in the park. The traffic was worse than we had anticipated and it took some very skillful overtaking by our dear friend Rex to keep us on time. We reached Chennai at about 1 and headed straight for Poorni and Prathi's house getting there at about 1:45. I fell out the car and after thanking Rex headed up stairs and collapsed.

Chennai "wiv da girlz"

I spent the next few days in Chennai. The weather was very hot. I was staying with Poorni and Prathi in their apartment.

On the Wednesday we didn't do very much, we just hung out in the apartment. It was really really hot. We ended up eating dinner in the bedroom cause it is the only room in the house that has AC. Samy and Christi both turned up at around 6 as they had had a meeting in Chennai. Samy left that evening but Christi was to stay until the following evening.

The next day Prathiba and Christi went off and Poorni and myself went into town to do some stuff. We had a big list of things to do. We both had photos from Mumbai to be developed, we had to do some shopping (food shopping), we had to book tickets for myself to return to Karur on the 10th and we had to book tickets for Poorni, Prathi and Amol (their maid) to travel to Karur on the 14th. We ended up waiting in a massive queue at a train ticket office, there was no AC, it was bloody boiling. We got the photos developed and went to food world to pick up some pasta among other things. I managed, much to my delight and surprise, to pick up some red bull, always a good thing when your feeling a little tired. When we returned Prathiba was back and Christi headed off to the station at about 6. Poorni busied herself with cooking and Prathi and myself went out to Quicky's (an American coffee chain) to have a coffee. When we returned we ate (very very good) and then got picked up by John and taken out to the Taj hotel, which, incidentally, has a late night bar in the basement. Most of India's bars and clubs are in top end hotels. We had a few drinks, listened to the three-piece female vocal group belt out numbers such as Avril Lavignels "sk8er boi" and then headed back to the house around midnight. We ended staying up until like 4 watching TV (ren & stimpy) and listening to Tracy Chapman.

Having not had a huge amount of sleep we were up the next day around 10ish. Prathiba had some stuff to do so we chilled out in the morning and in the afternoon myself and Poorni headed off out of Chennai to a cinema multiplex to see a movie, "Shanghai Knights." After loading ourselves up with popcorn sprite and an Indian version of red bull we headed into the cinema, which was packed with about 5 people. The movie was really good especially when you consider that a lot of it was filmed on Greenwich maritime Campus i.e. the University where I spent over a year of my life. I imagine Poorni got pretty annoyed after a while with me going "that's my lecture theatre," I used to sit on those stairs while having lunch" and "oh my god what's going on, this is madness." It was very very odd sitting there watching an American made film, in a south Indian cinema, watching a place where I had spent a year of my life in. Very bizarre indeed.

After the movie, which had an interval ("what's the point in that" I hear you ask, I have no idea), we headed back to the house where Prathiba had already returned. We chilled out for the rest of the evening, watched "gone in 60 seconds," listened to Tracy Chapman, the red-hot chili peppers and massive attack. I was feeling a little under the weather (polite way of putting it), Poorni came to the rescue and made me drink a whole bloody litre of water and re-hydration salts. We got ready to go out and were picked up at about 10 by john. We were heading off to another 5 star hotel which had a nightclub in it called "Sparks."

My first experience of clubbing Indian style, well what can I say. The first thing that struck me as being odd was the entrance fee. This is obviously normal, the difference being here that you are given vouchers saying how much you were charged to get in (in this case it was like R.s. 100 each therefore giving us R.s. 400 of vouchers. These vouchers are then redeemable at the bar. This meant that so long as you drank R.s. 100 worth of drinks each (not difficult seeing as a beer would cost around R.s. 100) entrance was effectively free. This was really odd. I don't think I have ever heard of anywhere in the UK where your entrance fee is redeemable at the bar. This pretty much makes going out stupidly cheap especially when you think that entrance to a club in the UK can cost anywhere from a fiver to like 20 squid if you were to go to a big event at The Drome (if it were still there). This and the fact that you have to pay like 3-4 quid for a bottle of larger just makes it stupid. I know that the currency is totally different and that people make ALOT less but it does make you think, especially when 4 of you walk out of place after a night out and you aint even spent enough to buy 2 beers in a London club let alone tube, taxi, kebab, and entrance. Madness I say, madness. Another thing is security. In the UK the minute you walk up anywhere you are suddenly faced with a few, usually very large, dudes in long black coats who look at you like they are about to punch you. Here there were none, you had your hand stamped and that was that, have a nice night. There were no bouncers inside or out. I know its stupid but I really couldn't believe it. When was the last time one of you guys walked into a club and saw no security? Never! Even bloody pubs have bouncers nowadays. Maybe its cause they can't find anyone who looks intimidating enough. I aint seen many really intimidating people out here, no ones really tall enough to look scary. Maybe I'll set up a "door service" for local clubs and bars. If you put a couple of 6 foot 5, skin head, London bouncers on the door of an Indian club I don't imagine they'd get much business, I imagine the punters would be wetting themselves.

Like many commercial places in the UK all these hotel bars and nightclubs seem to operate the, couples only, no large groups of guys etc policies. They seem to be quite strict about this. A lot of places simply charge for couples and therefore if you go and you aint got a lady friend with you then you aint getting in.

The place itself was really nice, nicely done up with a small dance floor surrounded by tables and chairs. They were lots of UV lights and crazy patterns on the walls. This was approached up some stairs from the bar area. The bar was nice and had a large area next to it with tables, chairs. The music on the other hand was just plain odd. Where as in the UK most nights tend to stick to one kind of music, here there were blatant time slots for different types of music, which was all pretty much at the commercial end of things. They played chart stuff mainly. The place reminded me of many commercial places in the UK but it was a really really lovely evening. The bar itself was open till anywhere between 4 and 6 (so I gathered) but we headed off at about 3:30. Although you could, obviously, buy drinks and stuff at the bar there were waiters, which was really odd. They also did foods in the form of snack food, munchies, which was also really bizarre. UK wise the place was probably a cross between "the loft" and "squares" (if you're in Norwich), "dojo" and one of those trendy places on the waterfront (can't remember what they are called) if you're in Bristol) and any small commercial bar if you're in London. The range of people was also really odd. I think this all comes from lack of choice. Where as in England, there is choice and therefore the clubbing population is separated out into different places, here everyone mingles into one place. It was odd but a really fantastic night. Will defiantly be going out more.

The next day, being Saturday, we chilled out for a bit and then headed off in a three-wheeler, to Iggy's. We chilled out for a bit, watched the video of the communion, watched the video of him filming the three of us whilst asleep in Mumbai (not nice), watched some matrix cartoons about before and after and separate story lines running of the main movie, watched the video of me doing fire at MTL day (not bad, could have been better) had lunch and then headed off into town to do some shopping (I had a few bits and pieces to pick up).

We ended up in a department shop called lifestyle where, unfortunately for us blokes, has a wide range of women shoes. Having had a look round we headed off to the Quicky's coffee shop they have in the store and indulged in the one thing that I am actually allowed to pay for in India, you guessed it, coffee. We then headed back to the house where Prathi took leave and went off to dance class. Poorni and me hung out for a bit, she made me some food for the journey and then we jumped into an auto and headed for the station. There was a bit of last minute panicking when we couldn't find the station pass counter and I lost her for ten minutes but after she had a ticket we embarked on the massive walk along the train to the AC coach (always at the end) said our goodbyes and I hoped on. I ate, did some contact juggling and then went to sleep (bottom bunk at bloody last).

On Sunday 11th morning I arrived in Karur and was met by Velu who took me back to the village. I was knackered and didn't do much all day apart from pack and hanging around. I went up to the site to see what progress had been made. They had concreted the pool, the walls had been finished on both the dorms and on the theatre and they had concreted all the floors. It all looked very good.

Sri Lanka, mission "Keep Jaime in India."
Colombo, city of the crows.

On the morning of Monday 12th I left at about 10ish and arrived in Tritchy at about 12. I had lunch with Raj (driver) in a hotel and then headed off to the airport where I was dropped off in departures. I checked in my bags, filled in some immigration cards and went through customs. My main bag didn't have any problems but customs had a field day with my hand luggage and me. Having set off one of the metal detectors I was frisked and then set apon by one of those hand held metal detectors. The dude couldn't work out why my chest was setting the thing off. He kept on looking at it, hitting it against the wall and generally getting confused. He called for help; know one knew what was going on. I tried to explain that I had earrings through my nipples. No, they didn't understand that. I ended up having to take my top off to show them where the beeping was coming from. They looked scared. My whole body was generally beeping. My shoes were going mad. After a while they just gave up and let me through. Then came my bag. I had forgotten about airport and packed my contact-juggling ball in my hand luggage. They didn't like that at all and explained that I could throw it at someone. I explained what it was for and gave a brief demo, no, they weren't convinced, plus they had spotted a pair of scissors in my bag on the x-ray, which, for some reason, they couldn't find in my bag. They informed me that they would have to confiscate my bag, have it put in some special place and I would get it back apon arrival.

The plane journey was pleasant. Like my flight to India I had been nervous about it but I really enjoyed it. Food, lots of coffee, not bad at all.

I arrived in Colombo at 3 (Indian time), 3:30 (Sri Lankan time). Got my bags and headed out of the arrival hall to get a cab at one of the many government tourist desks. I changed some money. The man filled in the form and led me outside to the cab. It was pissing it down; he serenaded me, a few verses of "you are my sunshine", ok?

I got in the cab, he got in the back and then decided to inform me that I may have a brain tumor and that's why I had a lump on the back of my head, "you should get that checked out mate," ok?

Having dropped our stow away from the airport myself and the driver drove to Colombo, about 30 km from the airport. Its one beautiful country. It is the monsoon over there. IN actual fact, the day after I left, 200 people were stranded and some died in some of the worst floods they have had there in a long time, in Colombo.

Facts about Sri Lanka:
· Its not that big, only 25,000 sq miles
· Currency, Sri Lankan rupee. About 157 per British pound.
· Religion, it is predominantly Buddhist.

Having eventually found the place I was met by father Costa. The journey had taken little over an hour and cost about R.s. 1200.

Father Costa is a Catholic priest; in fact I was staying in a seminary where they train priests and stuff. It is the permanent residence for some 10 priests who work within the community etc. It was one big place, a maze of open corridors leading onto terraced and enclosed gardens, basketball court and lawns. They had dogs, chickens, ducks, roosters (if I never hear another one crow in my life it will be too soon) and even a few tortoises. They have two chapels, one very large church and a million and one offices, bedrooms and communal areas. It was one beautiful place.

Father Coast was the superior of the place. Oldish gentlemen who always wore one of those cassock things with those big black belts, he looked like a monk. He actually looked like a cross between "Father Ted" and Karate Kids Mr Miyagi (there was another father that looked like the toad man in "The League of Gentlemen" and the caretaker looked like the hunchback or Notradame). Very very nice dude. He gave me the tour of the place. It had the feel of an old folks home, all the priests were indeed old. I met them all and had dinner at about 8. Sausage and potato curry, not bad at all, with lots and lots of freshly baked, crusty bread which was fantastic, so much better than the bread you get in India, apparently it's a climate thing. I was whacked and went to bed at about 9. My room was nice, overlooked a garden and chicken coop, bloody roosters. It had a bed with a massive wooden frame over it to which a mosquito net was placed. It was numerous shelves, a wardrobe, desk, chairs, full-length mirror and on-suite bathroom with shower and toilet, not bad at all.

On the Tuesday I was up at 6:30 and had breakfast at about 7, pancakes and dhal (lentil curry). It was raining very very heavily.

Father Coast gave me a lift into Colombo (as the house is on the outskirts) and dropped me off at the Indian High Commission, which is right on the sea front, at about 9:15. I filled in a few forms, waited around a bit, paid (R.s. 3600 about 25 squid) and then got a taxi back to the seminary at about 10. I made some phone calls to India, had lunch (beef curry and rice) and then took an auto three wheeler back down to the Indian High Commission. Arriving there at about 4:30 I picked up my visa (was very very surprised that it was ready that same day, and then took the same auto to the bank. I changed some money and then took the same auto to the World Trade Centre which was a very impressive two tower building in the heart of Colombo. There I went up and, having decided to cut my trip short for reasons that should become apparent, went to Sri Lankan airlines offices and changed the return date to India from 21st to 17th. I then took the auto back to the seminary and was back by 7. I was very very pleased with myself. It sounds stupid but it was the first time I had been out on my own and the whole trip had gone very well, my visa was sorted, my return booked and I had money, all good.

There were several reasons why I decided to cut my trip short. The first and foremost being that I didn't want to spend much money and upon arrival I realize that staying until 21st and keeping occupied that long was going to cost quite a bit. The second reason was that the girls were heading down to Karur on the 14th and leaving on the 21st. They had asked me if it was at all possible to come back early. Had been looking forward to their visit for ages and I wanted to see them in Karur even if it was just for a few days.

We had dinner at about 8ish (chicken and pasta, very hot) and then I chilled out in my room, read and went to sleep.

On Wednesday morning breakfast was again at 7. The bloody rooster had woken me up at 4 and a massive cyclone had torn at Colombo all night leaving floods everywhere and trees toppled all over the place. In the seminary 20 or so banana tree's had been uprooted and several others had had limbs ripped off, a few had been blown over. Even so it was one beautiful morning, the sun was out, it was warm. I had a walk, did some reading, took some photo's, discovered a 1955 Morris Minor in perfect condition and still running like a dream round the back of one of the out buildings and then had lunch at about 1.

At 3:30 I met father Costa in the dinning room, had a cup of tea and then went for a walk around the local area. He took me, with another, down to the beach, which was in a terrible state after the cyclone. There were trees strewn everywhere, rubbish littered the whole beach and seemed like a never-ending carpet. It was known as crow beach and was a local hand out. We had a walk up and down, to the river estuary and then headed up into one of Colombo's many shantytowns where we took a short cut round to a big Buddhist temple compound. We headed inside and were met by an old Buddhist monk dressed head to toe in this massive orange drape. They engaged in some conversation and then the monk gave us leave to have a look round the small temple and shrine. We did so, after removing shoes and hats, and then had a quick peek into the pagoda where they all meditate. The whole place was full of statues of the lord Buddha. There was a massive Buddhist festival celebrating the birth of Buddha going on for the whole time I was there and therefore all the temples were decorated with the Buddhist flag and other religious decorations as well as millions of fairy lights. We headed back stopping for a few bits and pieces on the way back. We got back at about 6ish. We had dinner at about 8, very hot curry and lots of lovely bread. I did some reading and went to bed. During the night there was another massive thunderstorm, and I mean massive.

Thursday up early and breakfasted at 7,with all the other priests. There was not much to do. All the shops were closed, as this was the start of the two-day festival to lord Buddha, a bit like our Christmas. Had a bit of a walk and did some reading. Just generally hung around and ended up getting very bored. During the day, apart from lunch, all the fathers disappear, they don't seem to do much or go out at all but there was not a lot of company around during the day.

After dinner myself and father Costa headed out with two brothers to have a look at the festivities. We walked up the road to a Buddhist temple to see what was going on. This festival is very important in Sri Lanka and everyone, including non-Buddhists, take part, it had become somewhat commercialized, like Christmas. The streets were lined with stalls and shops all lit up and most having massive paper lanterns hanging outside. All the stalls were giving away free food and drink. There was partying in the street, dj's, music, loads of lanterns and everything was lit up with millions of fairy lights. It was very impressive. The area where the seminary was located is a bit of a dodgy area, it is a very poor areas and yet all the stops had been pulled out and everyone was partying hard. We reached the temple, which was on both sides of the road. The whole place was full of people but there wasn't an orange Buddhist monk in sight. Everyone was making offerings to the statues of Buddha. On the right of the road there was a large shrine where people were praying etc and on the left there was a large pagoda where people were gathered, meditating and listening to loud chanting through a public announcement system. The whole place was covered in Buddhist flags, which have many coloured stripes on it. Everywhere smelt like the Drome. That sickly sweet incence smell. We headed back, got back at about 10 and I went to bed.

Pretty much every morning one was woken by one of three things. First off it is the roosters who crow at my window and who, I must admit, I wanted to shoot by the end of my stay. The second was the sound of rain which, and this is no exaggeration, actually sounded like someone had turned a bath tap on next to my bed. The third thing was a little nicer, shall we say, and was the sound of religious chanting floating in from one of the many shrines or temples in the areas. They use public announcement systems play religious chanting in the morning. This is what woke me up on Friday.

Having had breakfast I went back to bed cause I hadn't had much sleep due to unlikely combination of rooster crowing and thunder claps during the night. When I got up again at about 10 decided to have a walk round the neighborhood and father Costa decided to join me. We headed off in the opposite direction than had been the night before and before long came to a church. This walk had an alterior mission and that was to find a launderette where I could have my jeans washed, having done all my other washing Indian style, i.e. in the shower. We found one right next to the church, handed the stuff in and then popped into the local parish church to have a quick peek. Having done so we got a lift back to the house in the car of one of Father Costa's congregation, nice man. I made some more phone calls in the local STD ISD blah blah shop and, not being able to reach AREDS at all (by the end of my stay the people in the Shop knew the number off by heart and merely dialed it the moment I walked in the door), headed back to the seminary for lunch, three, guesses, hot, no, very hot curry.

At 3:30 I again met with Father Costa, had some tea and then went on yet another walk. This time he took me through another shantytown to see what poor people's living conditions are like. The answer to that is "not good." They generally live in very bad conditions. Not nice. We crossed the river next to its mouth and headed off to another Buddhist temple. We had a quick look around the outside and then caught a bus into the town. When I say bus I use the term lightly. It was more of a large van. I have never ever been so cramped in my entire life. The inside was decorated with many many depictions of events in all of Sri Lanka's main religions from pictures of the life of Buddha to pictures of Hindu gods and even a few pics of Jesus.

We disembarked in town and took a short walk up the road to where the main celebrations would be going on that evening. On one side of the road there was a massive shrine and I mean massive, I'm talking a house height shrine with a huge Buddha in the middle. Round it were hundreds of different coloured lights and depictions of events in the life of the lord Buddha. It was amazing. I have never seen anything like it in my life. We took some photos and headed up the road to a permanents shrine in the middle of a roundabout that was covered in flags and lights. We then headed back over the river, although on a different bridge and turned left to walk along the river and so back to the seminary. We walked through another shantytown and through a few nicer areas and then arrived back at the house having been out for just over 3 hours.

In the evening there was another massive thunderstorm. After dinner I finished Lord of the Rings and then went to bed at about 10ish.

On Saturday I was late for breakfast having not slept very well due to thunder and lightning. It being my last day I had quite a bit to do. I had a walk after breakfast and then settled my bill by way of contribution to the upkeep of the place. I had a walk down the road on my own to pick up my laundry which they informed me would be done by 6. On the way back I bought a loaf of bread for the journey and then tried to reach AREDS again, no answer. Everyone was asking me where I was going and I do mean everyone. Having been told that if I said church no one would bother me this is what my answer was. I started reading a book that Father Costa had given me on religious enlightenment called "Bede's journey to the beyond" which was written about a English monk who moved to India and set up an ashram about an hour from Karur. During my stay we had had many talks about my religious beliefs and my lack of religious direction. He told me that my general lack of direction in life and my sometimes inner feeling of emptiness were probably down to my lack of experience religiously speaking, interesting theory. More thought on this matter is required.

At 6 I headed back to the Launderette with Father Coast in tow. We picked up my laundry and headed back. I was again quite pleased with myself having ventures out so much in an area of a city that was generally considered a little dodgy. I had handled it fine, managed to do everything I needed to and done it all on my own. When there wasn't anything to do I was generally feeling a little bored and a bit flat/low. Had had a really good time but was glad to be getting off.

Did some packing and then had dinner at 8. Took some photos of the fathers. Said my farewells and headed off in a pre booked taxi at about 9.

I had thought that the journey back to the airport was going to be boring but it turned out to be one of the most exciting parts of the whole trip. The taxi driver took me right through the center of town and past the massive, lit shrine that I had seen previously. It looked absolutely amazing and I managed to get a few pics out the window. The place was heaving. It was like a cross between Glastonbury festival, Nottinghill carnival and Christmas. It was incredible. There was no point throughout the hour journey when I couldn't see lit up decorations. We passed many many shrines, temples, millions of lamps in houses, offices, building sites etc. Everywhere was covered with stalls giving away food and drink and everyone was partying hard, was incredible, very Drome like.

I reached the airport and checked in at 10pm. My flight wasn't until 1:35 and I was flying to Chennai, not Tritchy, as it was the only place near by that still had places left on the flight. There was a bit of problem checking in. I hadn't been booked on the flight even though I had paid and v\been told I had been booked in at the airlines head office. I hung around the airport, went to duty free but everything was still expensive in comparison with Indian prices. Drank lots of coffee. Boarded flight, had to fill in lots of SARS forms saying where I had been. There were loads of people walking around with masks on. Flight was really good but late.

Got into Chennai at 3am, local time. Was 32°c outside. Went though customs and health checks with not much hassle. Was met by Iggy's driver and reached Iggy's apartment at 4, in bed by 4:30. Didn't really sleep cause I had drunk so much coffee trying to stay awake in the airport.

Three weeks and over 5000 km later…

On Sunday I was up at 9. Was running totally on autopilot. The lights were on but no one was home. I was in a state. Watched a bit of TV with Iggy and then headed off to mass at Maggie and Tib's at about 12. There were lots of people there. Gerry and Rohit had come down from Mumbai so it was good to see them. Rex and Divya were there so was good to see them. Spent the mass just listening to what was going on and trying to keep awake. I looked like death having not really slept well for a few days, quite a few people commented on this fact, which further led me to the conclusion that sleep and a lack of social interaction was probably the best thing for me to do in such a condition. After mass we had lunch. There was a pair of weighing scales in the dinning room. I weighed myself, 66 something, can't remember what it was in. A few weeks into my arrival in Karur, Samy and Christi weighed me (for some unknown reason, maybe they want to fatten me up to eat me); I have not put on any weight. Good news although I can hear a lot of you disagreeing in the usual manner. At about 2, I excused myself and headed back to Iggy's to chill out a bit. It was a lovely 42°c (114°f) outside and getting into the car was physically painful. Watched some TV, slept for about an hour and then at 6 was picked up by Iggy's driver and taken to the train station. I picked up some food in "planet yum" and jumped on the train. Went to bed at about 9 having eaten but I didn't sleep all that much, was constantly woken up by the sound of the AC and by the train tipping from left to right, one has to be careful not to fall of ones bunk especially when your suspended 7 feet off the ground. It was very hot.

On Monday morning was up at about 5:30 washed and ready to disembark at 6. The train was running an hour late so I stood at the open door and watched sleepy south India pass by whilst the sun rose. Was met in Karur by Raj and driven back to AREDS.

Having arrived in Renganathapuram everyone was up and about. It was fantastic to see everyone (Christi, Samy and the girls) had missed them since I'd been away. The girls had changed their program and would now be heading back up to Chennai on the 23rd, which was great. Also staying in the house was Samy's sister and her husband. The girls had both come down with the intention of learning to drive. Poorni had previously learned but wanted a refresher course so she could apply for an international driving license for when she goes to Holland and Prathi hadn't learned before and wanted to. At about 10 they headed off to Karur to follow this up and I headed up to the site to see what was to be done and to get back to work. The concreting of the pool had been completed. They were going to be laying all the roofs soon and the job in hand was the plastering and pointing off all the walls. There was no electricity and the work that was being done was not suitable so Samy and myself hung around. We made sure that the juice was flowing so to speak so that the concreted pool could be cured by water and then headed off to SWATE where we checked out the planting that had been done to see if it was being maintained. We had a bit of a problem getting the new Sumo jeep going, until I realised that we had accidentally switched on the immobiliser, and once that was sorted we headed off back home.

I was beginning to feel decidedly dodgy. It was very hot and over the last few days my general state of health had not been particularly good. I have been getting very dehydrated very quickly. I have been feeling very sick and my appetite hasn't been particularly good at all (which has made the usual worry about Jaime and food even worse). I have generally been totally exhausted, like, not being able to make it up a flight of stairs exhausted. We have come to the conclusion that it is just a mild dose of heat exhaustion but whatever it is I have been feeling very ill.

Anyway, the next few days all seemed to lump themselves into one what with early mornings and late nights. I worked Tuesday and Wednesday and then was told that I should not be going to work but resting instead. Have not been feeling tired, just exhausted, and therefore me and the girls have been staying up late into the night just talking and listening to music. They have been going for driving lessons and from what I have seen, both doing very very well. On Thursday we spent the afternoon up at the farm in the water tank chilling out and drinking coconut water. Over the next few days there was a village temple festival going on in the village. On Tuesday when I went up to work there were loads of people carrying around decapitated goats, which was not a particularly nice sight. They have erected some large towers over the road and they have covered them in lights, they put up a large stage and had an orchestra playing a few nights ago. They have had fire works and they have been playing music over the public announcement system from early in the morning (5ish) till late at night (sometimes till 3). We have generally been chilling out. One night of the festival there were fire works and we headed up onto the terrace to see them. There was also a big thunderstorm going on a way off and the lightning display was pretty bloody impressive. Was fantastic spending time with them both here. They left (driving up to Chennai, not train) on Friday. Didn't want them to go, miss them both. They will both be returning on the 7th accompanied by Gerry and Rohit, which should be good. Prathi starts back at college on the 17th and Poorni is just hanging around and finalizing stuff for uni. She leaves by August 10th. Plan on venturing up to Chennai at the end of July to spend time with her before she goes. May also go up around my birthday as I can go out in Chennai, depends on a few things.

On Saturday, having woken up at about 10, I headed up to the training center at about 11:30 to take part in a workshop that has been put on for the kids of AREDS employee's. I got there and at about 12 we all (about 20 kids and 4 adults) sat in a big circle and started making beats with implements gathered from the garden i.e. sticks stones and metal bowls and pans. The idea was to get them experimenting with rhythm. I had half of a tabla and once everyone had played a beat we chose the three best and simplest, split the group into three, moved the groups to separate area's of the hall and got them all to play their elected beat in unison with the other two groups. It worked quite well although they kept on going out of time and some just banged on the floor.

After this we all had lunch. After lunch I did some poi and juggling and got everyone else doing it. Was really really good but I found myself getting knackered out after 2 minutes of easy going poi so I stopped after a while. At 3:30 I got a lift home. Was exhausted, slept.

In the evening Samy headed off to Chennai. When I returned back to Karur I was informed that Ghita (caretaker of house), Lawrence (Carpenter) and Little man (their son) had moved to Bangalore to help Samy's sister and her husband. Am actually going to miss them a bit.

Caught red handed.

On Sunday woke up early to find that Christi had gone up to SWATE. She returned after lunch, up until then I had just been hanging around reading. We had made arrangements for a tailor to come to the house so that I could explain to him how to make a pair of flags (speaking of which, thanks very very much for the weights granny, exactly what I needed). The tailor didn't show up at the allotted time so, generally feeling a bit bored, we decided to cover me with henna (skin dye) which had been picked a few days ago, mashed up with water to form a paste and then applied. They (Christi and Samy's sister) drew 7 circles (filled in) decreasing in size to about the size of a penny piece, on my right arm, 7 stripes decreasing in length to about 2 inches long, on my left arm, 2 bands around my arm between my elbow and shoulder, 2 massive circles on the palms of my hands and stripes going up my fingers. Being totally unable to use my hands or arms I sat around waiting for the stuff to work. I had to drink coffee through a straw constructed, with great initiative, out of a papaya branch and generally get bored Watching Tamil TV. Every half an hour they covered the blobs of mush with water. I looked like I had been savagely attacked by a dog with a bad case of the shits. Using the phone when Prathi called me up was a bloody nightmare. At about 7:30 I had had enough and decided to wash the stuff off. The effect was of mixed success. The pieces on my arms could be seen but were light, a rusty colour. My palms and fingers, in contrast, were very bright vivid reddish orange. I look like I have an African sunset in each hand, its absolutely mad. The effect lasts for a month, unlike the few days henna in the UK lasts. It's all good.

On Monday I headed off to Karur with Anand for several reasons the main being that I had to register myself at the police station as a foreign resident in the area. I had to fill out a load of forms etc. Karur was mobbed. There was a Hindu festival going on and the whole place was awash with people, policemen and roadblocks and diversions. On the outskirts there was a massive fair ground on the bed of a dried up river. There were dodgems, Ferris wheels and loads of small roller coasters. It looked great but slightly unsafe, especially by UK standards. Got back at about 3.

At 3:30 I headed back out with Anand, back to Karur on a bike to pick up some photos. When I got back at about 4:30 the tailor had arrived and Christi and myself spent the next hour explaining how I wanted him to make my flags, with Christi translating.

At 8ish Christi left for Chennai. There is no one here apart from Ambiga. Feeling slightly lonely.

On Tuesday, Samy came by jeep, back down to Karur arriving at about 2, Tuesday morning, and leaving 8 hours later back to Chennai. Not feeling too good, had stuff to do for my registration to the police, photocopying, forms etc. Read, hung around all day. At night watched "the Jackal." The generator decided to run out of diesel half way through the night. My room turned itself up from 1 to gas mark 9.

Emerged feeling slightly cooked at about 9, ready for work. Anand said we had to go to Karur in the morning so I would have to skip work today. Headed off with him at about 11 having first received my flags from the tailor. They cost R.s. 50, I gave them 100, job very well done, and they work like a dream.

Got to Karur and headed off to the Chief of police's office. It was a holiday, he wasn't there. Bought some stuff, picked up some stuff, headed back with numerous stops on the way. I like riding on motorbikes.

On Thursday I got up to go top work and then got told that we had to go back into Karur to hand in the forms and stuff to the chief of police. Anand and myself headed in and went straight to the police station. We handed in the forms, they had a talk. They wanted to see some of my contact juggling. I obliged. We headed into Karur to get some stuff. The festival thing was still going on. Someone mentioned that 11 people had been killed on one of the fair ground rides. I thought they looked a little rickety. I bought a bottle of water and later realised that the plastic seal ring around the neck just came off with the lid. This aint meant to happen the plastic ring is supposed to be unmovable. I figured (as apparently is quite common) that the bottle had just been filled up with tap water, oops. We came back to the house and I just hung around for the rest of the day. I began to feel ill, I was ill, it passed.

On Friday morning I was woken up by the noise of thumping. I wondered what the hell was going on and, having stuck my head out my door, I watched some dude outside my window scaling a 35-foot (3 story building) coconut palm. I thought they used a piece of rope tied round their feet but this dude just shimmied up the damn thing and started cutting off all the coconuts. It was incredible seeing this dude just running up this vertical pole. Apparently they have to cut all the coconuts down from the tree's in the back garden otherwise they can fall on people. That morning Samy returned from Chennai. I headed up to the site to do some work. The bridge over the pool had been concreted in and still had the supports holding it up. They were pouring water on it to cure the concrete and make it waterproof. They had put a layer of scored plaster on the inside of the pool. The next thing is to plaster and lay mosaic tiles. Then it will be pretty much done. Will still take a long time. They have finished laying the roof of one of the toilets and have plastered the inside of all the dorms and the theatre. Next step is for the roof to be put up. They said they would be finished on the 7th, yeah right. Today, all the tenth standard (GCSE equivalent) results came out. Everyone was constantly trying to get on the computer to download the results, problem being that the Internet is still buggered. They did it eventually. All the AREDS staff children passed. Congratulations.

I was sent to dig a hole with a few others around all but the door side of the theatre for the use of planting. It was about 40°c. Digging was difficult in that heat. Got very tired very quickly cause I was in direct sunlight. Was sweating buckets. They realised I was obviously feeling uncomfortable in the sun and moved me into one of the dorms assisting one of the plasterers by handing him stuff, transporting cement and water and generally lending a hand. Samy came at 12:45, we had a look around. We left.

Having had lunch I wanted to go into Karur to do some stuff and have a pair of shorts made as the pairs I have are beginning to look a little tatty from working. I wanted a "good pair." Myself, Anand, Raja and Ambiga headed off into Karur in the AREDS school bus, odd I know but apparently there were no other vehicles. Don't know if being back in a school bus was the cause of it but during the entire journey they all acted like school kids, sticking their heads out the windows and yelling to people they knew. We went and bought some material and, having brought another pair of shorts in as a template, I explained I wanted them longer and wider. The material cost R.s. 350 (about 4 squid), they would be ready the next day. We did some other stuff. Picked up some paper for a SWATE publication, bought some toothpaste and deodorant, I bought a couple of beers having been reminded it was outdoor beer drinking weather in the UK, thought I'd join in.

"Do you smell bacon?" "I definitely smell a pork product of some kind."

Samy was required to write a letter to the Chief of police saying that I was indeed staying with them. He had given us it, and we headed off to drop it off at the station on the way out of Karur. I stayed in the bus with Raja. Anand reappeared after about 15 mins and, with a group of police people, went across to a café across the road. We began to wonder what was going on. After about 15 minutes he came back to the bus. The police were not happy with my registration; they wanted to know were I had been for the last 5 months. Anand had told them that I had been in Chennai. They wanted to know why I hadn't registered in Chennai, he didn't know. He had had to buy them all coffee and cigarettes to keep them happy for the time being. They said that if I couldn't produce a letter or documentation of registration in Chennai they would want money in return for "turning a blind eye" so to speak. Anand explained all this to me in the bus. I told him that I had gone to register with the Chennai police and that they had said they didn't know what I was talking about "registering" and not to worry about it. I told him that the police were not getting one bloody rupee out of me. The Indian government require a valid passport and a valid Indian visa for me to legally stay in the county, I had both. I wasn't going to start bribing policemen. The coffee and cigarettes shouldn't have been bought, I was doing nothing wrong. It's their bloody problem not mine. Had the police been doing their jobs properly there wouldn't be a problem. When we got back I told Samy they were after money. He said the same thing, never back down to these people. They aint getting a thing. This all seemed very bizarre to me. I didn't realize it, but this is how the police operate, this is perfectly normal, Anand was not surprised al all, he said this was part of "Indian culture". It made me really angry but it was nice to know that if this was indeed how stuff worked, all you would have to do, if you had a problem with the old bill, was to throw some money at them and the problem was likely to go away, safe.

On Saturday Samy had suggested I come to Coimbatore with him. We had to drop him off at the airport as he was heading up to Bombay for some meeting, he'd be back on the 3rd. Christi was doing a similar thing. She would be back on the 2nd morning and would be leaving for Bangalore on 2nd night. These guys quite literally never stop moving around, madness.

Coimbatore is about 2 ½ hours away. Its quite a large place and is well known for being politically powerful and for having lots of money. We (myself, Samy and Raja) headed off at about 10:30 and stopped for coffee, in the same place we stopped off in on the way to Korthagiri, at about 12. We reached Coimbatore at about 1:30, dropped Samy at the airport (with lots of Banana's for Suresh and Viji) and then headed off to find a hotel to have lunch. After a while we found one (3-4 star, I think) parked the car and headed up to the restaurant. I felt seriously underdressed. I had on a massive pair of jeans and a basketball style top with armholes that showed off half my chest. I looked like I should be on a basketball court in Harlem, not in a plush hotel restaurant. We sat down. Where as usual everyone immediately consults the dude I'm with about what we want to eat everyone spoke English and started asking me all these questions. Raja, whose English aint good, just said to get him anything, "what you like, I like." After staring at a menu, and being stared at by everyone in the damn place, for about 10 minutes I decided the easiest thing to do, to avoid confusion with Raja, was to take the buffet which we did, very good food, very polite waiters who asked me where I was from, where I was staying etc. Really nice place. As per usual everyone questioned me on why I wasn't eating much, was I ok, did I not like the food. I explained that everything was fine. The bill came, 330 bucks, not even enough to buy 2 pints of larger. Paid, got asked to fill in a form on how I had enjoyed my food etc. Left tip, left. All good.

Headed back to Karur. Arrived in Karur at about 5:15. Went to pick up some stuff I had ordered, picked up my shorts, which are fantastic and then headed back home. Got home, collapsed, had dinner. After dinner I spoke to Poorni, tried to speak to Prathi in Goa, not much luck, the phones are buggered, it's like talking to a radio on static. Having received several e-mails on how the weather in the UK is turning nice and how its perfect, drinking beer outside weather, I sat down outside, had a bottle of kingfisher (arguably one of the best beers I have ever had) and went to bed.

Sunday was pretty boring. Spent most time reading or on the computer.

Monday morning saw Christi returning from Chennai. Was good to see her. I headed up to the site at about 10:30. We needed to start laying another level of cement on the base of the pool so that it can be scored and then the plaster and tiles can be laid on top of that.
Spent the morning lugging buckets of concrete around and transporting pans of cement onto women's heads. The bridge has had all it wooden moldings and supports taken off and is looking good. One can already walk on it. Once all this cement is laid and scored then we can start laying the tiles (which, apparently, is going to be done next week, I'll believe that when I see it,) and then all that needs to be sorted out are the electrics and pumps and the pool will be finished. The buildings have pretty much been finished apart from the roofs. We will also have to suspend a large net over the pool and possibly over the theatre as well. The reason, possible injury caused by falling coconuts. Also, the roof of the theatre, unlike the roof of dorms, which will be thatched, is going to be made out of tiles. The last thing we want is to have to replace them every time a coconut falls. Christi headed to Bangalore at about ten. She will be back on the 4th.

Thought I had pretty much seen all the types of household wildlife there is to see. Every night I seem to be squishing and decapitating cockroaches in the kitchen. Was sitting there at 11pm watching Irma La Douce when I heard a scrabbling. The dogs had been barking outside all bloody evening, I realised why. There had obviously been a rat in the yard and it had now plucked up the courage to come into the house where it was quietly minding its own business right in front of me. What could I do, I can hardly step on a rat. Rats don't bother me in the slightest but I must admit I got a bit of a shock when I saw it. I went into the kitchen to find something I could trap it in to transport it outside. By the time I got back, our little rodent friend had buggered off. Rats aint something you want around this place. Where there are rats (or "rat") there are snakes and after our encounter with the cobra a few months back I thought it best to get rid of the thing. I will do next time I see it.

Another thing that seems to have made itself a frequent visitor to the house at the moment seems to be toads. On Monday I had to chase one out of my bathroom. They can jump one hell of a distance and when they do they don't seem to go where you think they are going to go. They can jump off a wall, away from the wall, if you get me. I just went up to do some washing. Its dark and when I switched the light on I didn't see anything unusual. I reached for the tap, which, incidentally, is suspended 4 foot off the ground and about a foot away from the wall, and when I touched it I realised it didn't feel like a tap. Why, I hear you ask, three guesses, yep, it was a toad. A toad perched on a tap. I have to say, and this may sound stupid, but it was one of the most bizarre things I have EVER seen and I've seen some very odd things. A toad, on a tap. This will never fail to make me laugh.

Tuesday. Woke up this morning and went down to breakfast where I was immediately presented with some cake, icing and everything. One of Ambiga's sons had just been promoted. Not a bad way to start the day, cake for breakfast, how nutritious. Went up to the site and worked all morning laying a foundation for a small wall that is to be constructed round the theatre and dorms so that the level of the ground can be raised. Still no sign of the tiles which aint good at all seeing as the pool needs to be finished by the 7th so that it can be shown to the umpteen people coming down to SWATE for the AREDS GB (general board) meeting. Loads of people are coming including Mano, the girls (Poorni from Chennai, Prathi from Goa) and a load more other people. Should be 300 in all (that includes all AREDS staff located in the surrounding area.

Whilst I was working with the guys an ice-cream bike (fridge on the back of a push bike) turned up. They bought me some Kulfi in a cone. Having eaten it I realised that one of the main ingredients was water, probably tap water, oops.

Went back for lunch at 1. Ambiga has the day off and so my lunch was laid out waiting. Samy arrived back from Bombay at about 2. He's back for a while now until he goes to Beirut on like the 26th. Good to have some company, finally. Went into Karur to get some photo's developed and to buy some bleach as all my beautiful white t-shirts, which I am sure everyone is aware, I love, are beginning to turn an odd colour. The photos (all of which had not been developed from previous rolls of film due to the fact that they were "under" or "over exposed") were developed in less than 10 minutes, now why couldn't they have done that the first time around.

Wednesday morning I headed up to the site a little later than normal at about 11. Christi had returned from Bangalore at 5 that morning. Tried to get the Internet working, didn't work.

Was working all morning laying a brick wall round the two dorm buildings. One has to be finished in time for the general body meeting which means putting a roof on it. Not too sure if it'll be ready. Samy wants me to do a presentation to the body about the site and the project in general stating aims etc. Should be infront of 300 odd people, not too sure about public speaking but will defiantly write something. Samy and Christi had gone to Tritchy for the day and with them both away people had apparently forgot that I was working and needed to be picked up at 1. At about 2:30 Godwin turned up on foot to inform me that they had all forgotten and that there was a Sumo waiting for me down the road. By the time I got back it was nearly 3. I was very dehydrated, very burned and very very hungry having not eaten anything in the morning. Am now off to have a lie down because I am feeling very light headed? Its good to have the two of them back, company that speaks English at last. Samy will be heading up to Chennai on the 9th and Christi will be making the same journey on the 11th. Should still have the girls around at that point so that'll be nice although I aint too sure when they are leaving. Its Samy's birthday three days before mine, on the 15th June. Should also be doing something for that. Still not too sure what I am going to do for my birthday, Chennai, Karur, who knows. Will let you know nearer the time.

Friday was one hell of a nutty day. With the general body meeting happening on Saturday everyone was running around like mad people. There was so much work to do. This plus the fact that a lot of people were due to arrive that night and the next day meant that everyone who wasn't working on stuff for the meeting was cleaning EVERYWHERE, getting the rooms ready etc. I was asked not to go to work and to muck in with what was going on. I had to create a few posters with photos and captions explaining the progress we have been making up at the site, the aims of the project and general info on what we have been doing. This was then going to be presented to the board the next day. I spent the whole morning doing this, had lunch at one and then carried on until about 4 when I had to go into Karur to pick up some stuff. After picking up my stuff with Velu and Augustine we headed off to the railway station to pick up Mano who was arriving at 4:45. The train, surprise surprise, was late. We picked him up and then headed back to AREDS to continue the madness.

In the evening we got some bad news. Amol (Poorni and Prathi's maid) who was traveling down to Karur with Poorni that night had missed the train. They had arrived together late, Poorni had got on, Amol had handed her the bags and then the train had pulled off. We weren't too sure whether or not she had managed to jump on to another carriage or whether she was in Chennai station. Amol is a very very timid person. She does not communicate very well and apparently gets very nervous and panicky. We called chennai station and asked them to put a message out on the PA. Poorni, who was in a bit of a state, had told the people on the train what had happened. Velu, who was heading off to pick up Jerry and Rohit, had been instructed to wait at the station where the train would pass, to jump on and see if he could locate Amol. I offered to go with him. This was due to the fact that she had more chance of seeing and recognizing a 6-foot, bald white dude then she has any of the people AREDS could send. I would have gone but it would have taken time to get to where Velu was and this would have made him late. After a few hours we got a phone call saying that she had been picked up at Chennai station. The police having heard she was lost, had found her. She had been put into a YWCA for the night. She would then go home. Everyone was very very relieved.

AREDS General Body Meeting

Monday was a mad day. Poorni's train was a few hours late, turning up at like 9. Jerry and Rohit had arrived in the middle of the night. Prathiba had arrived with a load of others at 6 from Bangalore and then proceeded to come and wake me up and drag me down stair at 6:30. Was great to see her. She had been in Goa so had a tan. She had also had her nose pierced, which really suites her but she had had it done with a gun, disgusting things. I think she is getting a bit fed up of me telling her not to play with it, have given her the daily cleaning ritual for fresh piercing's lecture, lets hope her nose doesn't fall off ha ha.

I hadn't slept much at all. By 9:30 there were a load of people downstairs. Poorni eventually turned up, was great to see her as well. Samy and Christi headed of to SWATE (where the meeting was being held) and about 10 and told us (the girls, me, Gerry, Rohit and Ravi (a really nice friend of the family from Bangalore) to come up at 11. The girls had bought me a wicked black, tight diesel top from Chennai; Gerry presented me with 2 t-shirts and a sleeveless basketball shirt, which were all fantastic. I didn't know what was going, everyone seemed to be giving me presents for no reason. Hey man, I aint complaining. At 11:30 (having waited around forever on everyone getting ready, we finally made our way up to SWATE to show our faces at the general body meeting.

We walked in just as Christi was presenting the segment on ACTS (AREDS Children's Theatre School). She went through everything I had written and a lot more. She then spoke about me (all this in Tamil of which I was receiving a constant translation) and how such a project needed someone with the right mindset to do it properly, in me (apparently) they had found their man. Slightly OTT but very flattering, was very nice. I received a round of applause.

At about 1:30 we headed off to lunch in the SWATE garden restaurant. Was very good. After that we headed off to the site so I could show the guys what we had been up to. We had a look round. They have added the toilets and started to add the roof on one of the buildings. Looks good.

After that we headed back to the house and just hung around, listened to music etc etc. Prathi wanted to learn to do poi. I have been teaching her some stuff over the few days that she has been here and she is learning all the moves at an astounding rate, much faster than I have ever seen anyone pick it up. On her first day she could do moves that took me a year and half to master. Its ridiculous. She puts it down to having such a good teacher, yeah right.

On Saturday evening, as there were a lot of people around, Ravi suggested that I do some fire. We managed to get some kero from the village and after setting up I did my stuff so to speak. It was fantastic. I have missed doing it so much. The wicks were so much better than they had been at MTL day. I had an amazing time. Everyone seemed to enjoy it and I got lots of compliments on it afterward. Attempted a few breathes but being out of practice I didn't went to try anything major. None of them were that good, not in comparison with what they usually are. One decided to turn round and bite me on the chin, was a bit of a near miss. It was amazing. Reminded me just how much I love this stuff. Have to do more.

On Sunday morning we all (me, Poorni, Prathi, Samy, Ravi, Gerry, Rohit & Margaret (Ravi's mum) headed off to the training center. Ravi's dad had been a major player in the AREDS organisation. He had been on the GB etc. He had, sadly, died a few years previously and there was a monument erected up at the training center in tribute to him. They all spent some time at the monument. The two families are old friends. We had a walk round the training center. Prathiba wanted to see the well where we attempted to catch fish; I took her down there. We had some coconuts.

After the training center we headed back to the house to pick up Christi. They had all decided to go up to the farm to have a dip in the water tank (soon they should have a pool for such activities.) I decided to stay behind, wasn't feeling to good.

When they got back we had lunch and just hung around. Poorni, Prathi, myself and Ravi hung out, listened to lots of drum & bass, did poi, they danced. In the evening they had some dinner and then me and the girls escorted Ravi and Margaret to Karur train station to say farewell, they were heading back to Bangalore. Ravi invited me down to Bangalore, me and Prathi said we would make a trip down at some point to take in the local nightlife which is, apparently, pretty damn good. We drove home, more music, poi. Went to bed.

Monday was an AREDS holiday as everyone had been working so hard towards the general body meeting. We pretty much just chilled out. I taught Prathi lots more poi, we listened to music. In the afternoon we headed into Karur to do some shopping. I pretty much set myself up for this one; I obviously hadn't earned much from Bombay. We stopped of in some material shop and everyone went in. I stayed outside, did some contact juggling, gathered the usual crowd of onlookers. They were in the shop for well over an hour. I got bored, went back to the jeep and ended up sitting there with Raj with load Brazilian drum & bass blasting out the Sumo windows. The locals seemed to like it. The girls and Christi finally emerged and we headed off to buy Prathiba a nose stud for her freshly done (with a nasty gun I might add) nose piercing. We spent some time in a flash jewelers and walked out with a diamond studded gold nose stud, nice. We then headed across the road to another shop to buy some material for the girls. Christi went off to pick up Gerry who was still spending in the previous shop. We stocked up on chocolate, popping candy and lolly pops. They returned with photos of me doing fire. They looked pretty damn good. We headed to SWATE.

We had dinner in SWATE garden restaurant, which was, as usual, pretty fantastic. We waited around in SWATE and then headed back to the house.

Back at the house we ended up staying up late playing cards. When everyone went to bed Prathi and me stayed up and eating lots of junky, jelly, popping, sugary sweets.

Tuesday involved yet more poi, more music, packing and chilling out. At about 8 I took the girls and Christi to the train station and saw them off. We got back at about 10 by which time I was beginning to feel decidedly dodgy. Having called Robbie to wish him happy birthday I went to bed and had the most awful night. It was boiling hot and I was burning up but was feeling really cold and ended up wrapped in several blankets.

On Wednesday morning I got up to say good-bye to Rohit and Gerry who were leaving for Bombay. Having been stood up for about 20 seconds I blacked out and managed to land on my bed. Having decided that getting g downstairs was going to be one hell of a mission I figured someone would be up at some point. I was feeling really, seriously ill. Gerry appeared to say goodbye. Was stood at the door for less than a minute talking to her before everything started going black again. I excused myself and landed on my bed having. Ambiga brought me up some water. The whole day consisted of lying in bed. I couldn't get downstairs; I couldn't stand up for more than a minute without nearly blacking out. I was running a temperature. I had stomach cramps and one hell of a serious stomach bug. My inability to walk properly meant shower trips (when I was overheating) toilet trips and getting water was all very very difficult.

In the evening I managed to get downstairs. I felt dreadful but was no longer blacking out. I called Chennai. Poorni had a similar thing. I didn't eat. Having slept pretty much all day I watched Flubber, stocked up on water and went back to bed. That night was worse, a lot worse.

Thursday morning the black out scenario's returned but not for long. I went downstairs in the morning and called Chennai. I had been reading up on stomach bus in my guidebooks and was getting worried that some of the symptoms I was displaying were not normal stomach bug territory. They were described and being caused by a much serious problem that would not just go away. I spoke to Christi, talked over the symptoms and my research. One of the bugs in the book matched all my symptoms exactly. Christi agreed. She knew about this stuff, as she had to treat this kinda thing when there wasn't a medical place in the village. The drug she recommended was the same drug the book recommended, it also said I should see a doctor urgently, I couldn't make it into Karur, the drug would have to do for the time being. She called some people and sent someone to pick up this stuff and some electrol (re-hydration salt.)

For the past four years the one event that has held the top most spot for making Jaime miserable has been Heather. Since July 2000 the number one place has never been challenged, until now. On Wednesday 10th June 20003 her 4 year rein at number 1 came to an end (sorry Heather, but 4 years is one hell of an impressive run.) This new challenger came in the form of a cute, cuddly protozoan, technically referred to as Entamoeba histolytica. In short ladies and gents, I had Amoebic dysentery. Please take my word for this; it is one hell of a nasty thing to have. The stuff that this bug can do to your body is, quite frankly, remarkable. I aint gonna go into details about the sweats, the aches and pains and the shivers. I'm not going to bore with stories about the headaches, the blackouts and the obvious other symptoms of dysentery, which I am sure you can work out for yourselves. I'm not even going to go on about the hours of trying to get comfortable and sleep whilst your insides feel like they have been twisted up and run through a mangle. What I am going to do, however, is give you all some good advise. Should any of you ever be unfortunate to catch this vicious little bug the best possible thing to do, is to contact your local plumber, and have him install a urinal in your bathroom.

The drugs arrived and I started taking them. I am on a high dose of metronidazole most commonly referred to as Flagy. I have to take 200mg of this stuff three times a day for the next ten days. By Thursday evening things were already beginning to look up. I felt like shit but it was so much better than feeling like I had done for the last few days. I even managed to eat something in the evening, for the first time in well over 48 hours. Watched "Blade" and went to bed. Didn't really sleep.

Friday morning was ok. Still felt dodgy but much better in comparison with how I was feeling, which granted, aint difficult. Was up and about at 9:30. Hopefully should be feeling better so I can go up to Chennai. Samy and Christi both returned from Chennai at about 5. Good to see them both. Its Samy's birthday on the 15th so that should all be good.


News in this evenings that, one their way to from Karur, Raj, with passenger Vincent (the dude in charge of all the textiles) ended up partially rolling one of the Sumo's (jeeps). They swerved to avoid hitting an oncoming bus on a corner and tipped the Sumo on to its side. They managed to pop out the front windscreen, which wasn't broken, and climb out. They are both fine. Quick thinking by Raj probably saved their lives as he turned late enough to avoid a large ditch at the side of the road, which would have sent the jeep rolling. All this on Friday 13th, spooky stuff.

Saturday, feeling better but still not 100%. Am heading up to Chennai on the 16th night and will be there for about a week.

jaime





::: posted by j(e t')aime at 3:38 AM